This afternoon my mom and the older of my younger sisters are on their way from New York to Illinois to visit me on their way to Kansas. Currently they are in Ohio and still about 5 1/2hrs away. My mom is making the trip to take my sister to college at MidAmerica Nazarene University in Olathe, Kansas. This is her first year away from home for school after being at home for a year taking classes from local schools in NY. My mom also just got her conversion van that allows her to get in the van in her wheelchair as well as drive without getting out of it. So it's kind of a big trip.

Since they are coming to stay with me and see me, I decided that I needed to do a little something. It's one of those moments when I find it necessary to do a tangible big sister thing. So I decided to make a care package for her to take to college. I spent some time searching Pinterest for some ideas of things to put in it, as well as some ideas for what to use as the box. After spending a little time searching I decided to just head to the store and see what was available for a reasonable price. I ended up at Dollar General when I found what I needed to start it and I went from there. I was going to post pictures and explain how I did it yesterday, but since it is a surprise and they weren't on the road yet I decided to wait to post it. So today i'm going to share what I put in the care package. 

To start it off I picked up this small storage container from Dollar General ($2). It's a pinkish purple and white chevron print with a small piece of cork board on the front.

 

It's nothing huge but it's fun and it's functional. Two things that can be a big deal for a girl decorating her dorm room. As I was gathering the items to put in the box I wanted to make sure I had some fun things as well as some practical things. I also threw in some food and candy. What care package is complete without some??

First I got this navy blue floral tumbler from Dollar General. It was on sale for $1.87. Again, it is fun and functional...and it was a bargain! I then picked up some To-Go drink packets from Dollar General and Dollar Tree. They were all $1 a box. I got Tropical Punch Kool-Aid, Diet Snapple Peach Tea, and Wyler's Light Pink Lemonade. I used these to fill the cup.

I then grabbed some functional items from Dollar General & Dollar Tree. From Dollar General I got the following: Magnetic Dry Erase Board ($1), 3-Pack Kleenex ($1), 3-Pack Over The Door Hooks ($1), Sticky Notes ($1), and Thumbtacks ($1). From Dollar Tree: Student Calendar ($1), Outlet Extender ($1), and Halls Cherry Cough Drops ($1). These are some functional items that are practical for school and organization of a college dorm room.

While the dry erase board is functional, it is also fun. It has a cute blue and white polka dot print. It is a great item to put on the dorm room door so that she can leave messages for her roommate and her hallmates can leaves notes when they drop by and she isn't there.

I also picked up some other fun things from Dollar General, Dollar Tree, and JoAnn Fabrics. From Dollar General I got the deck of playing cards ($1). From Dollar Tree: Avengers Coloring & Activity Book ($1), Avengers Crayons ($1), Mini Jenga Game ($1), Blank Note Cards ($1), and Monsters University Hand Wipes ($1). From JoAnn Fabrics I got the Owl & Bee Sandwich Bags ($1) and the Blue Bracelets ($.97). These are just some fun items, although some are practical as well.

To fill up and round out the basket I got some food and candy. I got the Honey Teddy Grahams ($1), Spearmint Trident ($1), Peppermint Trident ($.50), and the Mega Smarties ($.38) at Dollar General. I got the Jolly Rancher Crunch & Chew ($1), Reese's Miniatures ($1), 3-Pack Jif To Go ($1), and 3-Pack Monsters University Fruit Snacks ($1) at Dollar Tree. It's not a lot of things, but enough to have a decent snack stash for the first couple of weeks.

I got home and took some time to arrange the basket with everything. It took a bit of time to arrange things so they fit and did so in a way that things weren't moving around while it is riding in the back seat of the bus tonight.

 

I tried not to show all of the fun stuff in an attempt to make her think I just got her practical stuff. For me that was hard because as I am going into my fourth year of college I would find all of it to be fun. Haha i've clearly been in on campus housing for far too long!! :)  Anyways, I then bagged it up using a Basket Bag that I got from Dollar Tree. They sell them in 2-Packs for $1. 

I then tied it with some ribbon that we had the office. This was not my first choice of ribbon, but the first choice didn't tie well and fell apart when being knotted. So I found this purple and pink striped ribbon. I actually think that I like this better. It turned out pretty cute! There are a lot of other things that I thought of that could be put in their, such as highlighters, pens/pencils, bubbles, and so on. It can truly be tailored to the student or individual that you are sending it to.

Also, just for fun since they are coming through and it may be the last time I see them for a few months, I picked up some desserts for them. I picked out two cupcakes from a local bakery in town that makes wonderful desserts and pastries! I have heard that their breakfast and lunch menu is delicious as well! This bakery is located in Downtown Kankakee and it is called Nana's 2 Cakery & Cafe. After a couple minutes of deliberation, I picked out a Peanut Butter Cup Cupcake and a Vanilla Cheesecake Cupcake. 

It's so hard not to eat these gorgeous cupcakes! Sorry for the long post and all of the pictures! I hope that y'all are having a great weekend before the school year starts in its entirety. 

God Bless!

The Table: What Is The Significance?

When I think back over my life and relive all kinds of memories, the very best memories and moments all seem to have taken place around one central point, whether in part or in whole. This central point just so happens to be the table. It wasn't always your typical table. Sometimes the table was a makeshift one in the middle of the living room floor or a park, sometimes the table was a fancy dining room table. Sometimes it was our own laps and other times it was porch railings. The form that the table took was never inherently important. What truly mattered was who was around the table. 
In some instances the people around the table were close family and friends, people I had known most of my life if not my whole life. There were times that they were friends I had known only a short time, acquaintances I knew merely by name, and sometimes they were people I met when they sat down. The variety of people is incredible to me. So many faces, personalities and stories have been gathered around these tables throughout my life. I have spent many, many hours around tables sharing funny stories and laughing with some of my closest friends and family. I have spent just as many hours around tables just sharing about life and learning the basics about people's lives. I have also spent a significant amount of time around tables sharing sorrows and pains and crying with people. The number of people has been different every time, but the honesty and truthfulness has been there regardless. Sometimes there are 30-40 of us taking up two long tables that we put into an L-shape where we are rubbing elbows the entire time while laughing constantly. Other times it is a one-on-one coffee date where we are talking about the hard parts of life.
No matter what form the table or the company takes, there is a huge significance to that simple item at the heart of it. The table. When we gather around the table there is almost always food and drink. We come for sustenance and nourishment. We come for great food and wonderful drinks. Most importantly, we come to the table to share our company. We gather around the table with people. The funny part about gathering around the table, with or without food, is that there is something inherently intimate about it. There is a connection that comes with gathering around such a simple item that cannot be imitated. As we gather together it is like our walls drop and suddenly we are vulnerable. I don't know exactly why that happens and I have a feeling it is different for everyone. 
During this last school year my seven roommates and I gathered at 9:30pm on Thursday nights to have a Bible study. We never did get started on time because we came in and would share how our days had went as we found a place to sit. Often times we brought our mugs either already filled or ready to be filled with coffee, tea or hot chocolate, blankets, and food of some sort. Sometimes we made cookies, brownies or cupcakes, other times it was chocolate of some sort, holiday candy, or chips/pretzels. We weren't too picky. The coffee table become a small buffet and we gathered around with Bibles and blankets. The mood was different every week as we all came in with our own burdens and joys. One week we were cracking up at everything and unable to stay serious for more than a couple minutes, and the next we were quiet and contemplative with our comments few. Many nights when we got to prayer requests someone would share a challenge or difficulty in their life and many times there were tears that accompanied it. In the openness and sincerity of the moments in the apartment our struggles both in our walk with God and our daily lives were shared with everyone. We shared the joy and the pain. We were there to celebrate with one another and to grieve with one another. On those nights we gathered around the table to share not only God's word, but our lives with each other. 
Gathering around the table with people is such a wonderful blessing. There are incredible moments and memories that come from the times when we grab a seat around the table and share with those we love. As I get ready to head into another year of school and living in a new apartment with three lovely ladies that I have never lived with before, I am really thinking about and processing the importance of life around the table. Bonds are formed and memories created. I really want to strive to be intentional about the time I spend around the table with others this year. I want to focus on building and strengthening relationships, as well as being open and honest with the people i'm around. There is a whole lot of hospitality that goes along with this, as you open your door and your life for others to come into. Shauna Niequist says the following in her book Bread & Wine: A Love Letter To Life Around The Table, "The heart of hospitality is about creating space for someone to feel seen and heard and loved. It's about declaring your table a safe zone, a place of warmth and nourishment.” I want our apartment and our table to be a place like this. Somewhere for people to come and relax, to share life with us, and to feel welcome at any time. 
What does the table mean to you? How have you been affected by what happens when we gather around the table? Do you see the importance of the table in your everyday life?

Passion Can Lead To Purpose

     Have you ever found yourself in a position where you are so tired and worn out with what you are currently doing that you wonder if it is really what you want to do? Has this made you question what you purpose is in life? Or maybe you are okay with what you are doing but still find yourself questioning what your purpose is. Sometimes we can start out doing something that we enjoy, at least at the time, and we our happy, but as time goes on we realize that it is not what we really want to do. Whether it be work, a long-term volunteer position, school (or a particular major), or any number of things, it can start draining us mentally, emotionally, physically, even spiritually. As it wears us out more and more we find it affecting our relationships with family and friends, our hobbies and activities, even our faith. We lack peace and joy in every aspect of our lives. Sure there may be moments when we feel those things, but overall we do not.

     There are all kinds of excuses for why we stay in positions where we feel no enjoyment and that drain us. Maybe we feel like we have to stay in the position we are in because of the security it provides. Maybe we feel like we will be letting people down if we do something else. Maybe we feel like we just are not good enough at anything else to do something else. Whatever the case may be, this is not how we should go about our lives.

     If this was the world that God initially intended it to be then we would all be able to spend our days doing the things that we enjoy doing, that we are passionate about. However, we do not live in that world but rather in this fallen world. It is not always easy for us to spend our live doing exactly that which we enjoy the most. What we can do however, is adjust our lives to fit the strengths that God has given us in a better way. This may not mean that we are able to do the exact thing that we most enjoy, but we can do something that is close to that or involves many aspects of it. By redirecting the things that we are doing to more closely fit the strengths that God gave us, we will be able to rediscover the joy and the happiness that God intends for us to have about life.

     For some of use we may not know what our strengths or gifts are, but it can be easy figure that out. You may feel like you are looking everywhere to figure out what your strengths are and it may seem like you have none or if you have any they are hidden. But here is a thought... Have you ever wondered if maybe you are looking in the wrong places or focusing on the wrong things? If you cannot figure out what to focus on, it can seem like strengths are nonexistent. Or maybe you feel like you have several strengths or gifts and you are having a difficulty figuring out which ones you should focus on. Figuring out what your strengths are can be as simple as answering some questions such as:

-What were your favorite subjects in school?

-What do you enjoy doing in your free time?

-What do you feel most comfortable and confident doing?

-What things seem to come natural to you?

     The list could go on, but it is questions like these that can help you figure what your strengths are. Once you figure that out you will more easily be able to find a way to make that a part of your life and work. Maybe that means a total career change or maybe it just means looking for a different position. If you are in school it might mean that you change your major or add a minor. There are all kinds of ways to redirect the things you do to fit your strengths. The joy and fulfillment you will find upon doing this will make life much more enjoyable. I really like the following quote about our strengths and passions...

What you are passionate about was

created in you to make a splash in this life

that no one else can make. 

-Nicole Johnson

     God only created one of each of us and he has given each of us different strengths and gifts. What we do with them is our choice and we can make an impact in our lives and on the world that no one else can. Whatever your strengths or gifts are, you can "make a splash". 

     So, what are some things they are holding you back from doing something that you truly enjoy? Or are you doing something that you enjoy and hope to continue doing? How can you make an impact using the strengths and gifts that God has given you? What are some ways that you are already making an impact with your strengths?

Here's The Thing About Ders...

Ok, so a lot of you that read my posts are also friends with me on Facebook.

Therefore you have seen various posts on there from me from the past weeks.

Many of these posts have been based in frustration about a lot of things that are going on.

Most of you, however, do not know what has been going on.

So here goes a basic recap of what has been going on these past weeks.

Three weeks ago I had my last day of full time work on Olivet's campus for the summer
That very same day I found out something that has completely changed everything.

My mom called to inform me that the judge had awarded full custody of my two younger sisters to our 'father'.

After four years of fighting against this, the worst happened.

Everything we had done to prevent this and it was all for nothing.

Or at least so it seems.

Our world came shattering down around us fast and hard.

Suddenly there were a million things that were starting to fall apart because of this ruling.

Financial issues regarding living situations, schooling, food, etc. were suddenly ten times worse than they were just hours before the letter arrived at the house.
We didn't have a clue how we were going to take care of everything.
We didn't know where money was going to come from or where we would be in a very short time.
We went from having things fairly well figured out for the near future to not knowing what was going to happen in the next couple of hours.
Emotions were (and continue) to run rampant.
Frustration, anger, sadness, fear, confusion, and so on and so forth.

Suddenly we had a million and one questions that needed answers, a lot of which we did not know.
What is the appeals process?
When can the appeals process be started?
How do we go about filing the appeal?
How long will the appeal process take?
When do the two girls move in with their father?
What will visitation schedule be for their mom?
What will happen in regards to finances?
What, if any, part of this will affect Shelbi and her schooling?
How do we pay for school?
How do we pay for rent for our house?
Etc, etc, etc...
The questions go on and on and they get more detailed and even harder to answer.
My mother and I have been working on answering these questions for the past few weeks.
It has been stressful and more times than not extremely frustrating.
Life is once again being completely controlled by lawyers, judges, and courts.
It is hard to sit back and watch them become the dictators of everything that can and cannot be done.
After years of it however, it is nothing new but it still is not something that is necessarily positive.

This all happened, with a lot more detail and emotion than I have shared but may share at some point, and I did not have any idea what I was going to do to make it through.
I was being faced with the very real possibility of not being able to stay here in Illinois at ONU.
It scared me and I did not know what I was going to do.
I did not want to leave and had more than a few break downs that first week.
One of those just so happened to be at my pastor's house.
(That was right after I had one in my apartment, which happened to include my lanyard flying across the room.)
I had a few more that first week, one of which resulted in my blowing off a good friend completely unintentionally.
Thankfully God has blessed me with friends who are understanding and are there for me even in my worst moments.
I ended up getting a job shortly after I found this all out.
I started that job the first week of classes.
Talk about stressing myself out and overworking myself.
So many things being thrown at me and a million things to learn and remember.
I'm still trying to get my feet firmly planted and a schedule set so I don't lose my mind.
Although I am pretty sure I lost it last week in amidst the craziness.
I keep being told of more things I need to do for classes, such as my multicultural hours for my Education class.
I have no idea how I am going to fit it in, but I hope I figure it out soon.
I am starting to enjoy work but at the same time I am not sure if I can keep the hours that I have right now.
I feel like there is a possibility that I might need a few less in order to fulfill my requirements for classes.

Well it has been a long few weeks.
God has been here through it all and I see Him in many different ways in the various situations.
But the devil has also been playing his cards throughout this whole situation the past few weeks.
He is constantly throwing in new things to tear me down and cause me to stumble.
Yet every step of the way I can see God working through it all.
It may not seem like it at the time but it is all working out the way that He sees fit.
At this point I am still at ONU and funds have been provided for me to stay for the year.
I don't know if that means I will be here next year.
I don't know what that means for the future at all.
I am currently in the process of possibly changing my major, so I don't even know what i'm going to be majoring in yet and that is kind of frustrating and makes it all hard.
But I am trusting God that will lead me in the direction that He wants me to go.
I do not know where that direction leads but I plan on following it where it takes me.
As long as it is in His will then it will not matter where it goes, but rather the things He has for me to do for His kingdom.
Even through the hardship, I know His way will prevail.

Falling at the feet of my Heavenly Father

These days it isn't uncommon in the least for children to not have a one or even both of their parents. In this world no one seems to think twice about it.

Divorce is common place and children grow up never knowing their parents.

It is more common for the father to leave, although it seems like this is changing these days.

The negatives of growing up without a father are constantly growing.

I myself have had to deal with this very issue.

Due to this I have had problems in my life, both in my relationships and my spiritual walk.

It is fairly easy to guess what the issues in relationships are.

However, it may not be so easy to see how it has impacted my relationship with Jesus.

Growing up without a positive fatherly image in my life has caused me to have trust issues along with many other issues I do not think are worth sharing at the moment.

This trust issue has caused me to not look positively at father figures.

Consequently this has made looking at God as a Father.

Trusting Him to be the Father that I have never had (and in all honesty could never have) is something that I have been struggling to do.

Many times throughout the past school year this was talked about by speakers in chapel.

It is something that I have been working on throughout this past year.

Many floor Bible studies also brought up the topic.

For some reason I just have trouble fully wrapping my mind around the thought that God is also my Heavenly Father.

I am not sure what keeps me from accepting it other than the fact that I previously mentioned.

I was reading my Bible today and ran across a couple verses that seemed to just click with me.

5A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling.

6God sets the lonely in families, he leads out the prisoners with singing.

-Psalm 68:5-6a

"I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty."

-2 Corinthians 6:18

Even though I may not have had a father in my life showing me how a father is supposed to treat his children, there is a God who wants to show me how a true Father is supposed to treat His children.

My Heavenly Father has shown me and continues to show me what it is like and how blessed I am to be His child.

He is constantly protecting me and blessing me.

Like the Psalm says, God has placed me in a family.

He has placed me in an adopted extended family that is absolutely incredible!!

(I also don't get to see often enough!! This past week of Family Reunion was a blessing!!)

On top of that He has placed me in an amazing church family at Journey that I am continuously being blessed by whenever I am with them!!

God has shown me what it is truly like to be a child of the one Father who loves me unconditionally, continuously shows me grace and mercy, and never leaves me.

He is my Father and He always will be.

An earthly father may fail but my Heavenly Father will never fail.

Though my father and mother forsake me, the LORD will receive me. -Psalm 27:10

Some Things Are Not As Dead As They Seem

I'm really not sure how to go about starting out this post.

I have some good things to share and some not so good as well.

I guess I will start with the good.

God has blessed me tremendously!

I have a church family in Illinois that has accepted me as I am and where I am.

They have more than opened their arms to me.

They have wrapped me up in the church family.

I feel like I am truly accepted by my church family and I haven't felt that way in a church in many, many years.

(Yes, I call them my church family. This may seem weird to those of you in Nebraska, and maybe even to a degree it may seem as though I am turning my back on you all. I still love you all, but this is a new chapter in my life and I have my own life in Illinois and this includes my church.)

God has placed me amongst a church family that is truly amazing.

Without them this summer would have been a very long, lonely, boring summer.

They have made Bourbonnais feel like home.

I couldn't have ever asked for what they have given me.

I appreciate it all and I am extremely thankful to everyone for what they have done for me.

I have to talk about the Mission Team again.

They are all amazing and I am grateful to have this summer with them.

I have to focus on the guys because I have spent the most time with them.

These guys are such a great influence in my life and I think God has put them in my life for a reason, possibly multiple reasons.

These guys blow the phrase "Chivalry is dead" out of the water.

They never fail to go out of their way to make sure the females that are with them at the time are taken care of first or put first in general.

This is something that I haven't grown up with and am not used to.

I have to make a conscious effort not to chastise them about it because I know that they are doing exactly what they are supposed to and it is my job to encourage them as their sister in Christ.

I may not have grown up with it, but it is something that I am slowly getting used to.

It is becoming something that I expect.

These guys have been such a positive influence in my life in how I view men.

I have never had this example of chivalry or of guys being gentleman before.

It is nice to know that there are guys who are still being raised with those standards.

It just makes me hope that I will end up marrying a man who is like this guys and who will be the example of a true chivalrous gentleman to any kids he is around or helps raise.

The guys on the mission team have no idea how high they have made me raise my standards.

They're just making it that much harder for a guy to get me to date him.

I appreciate all of their influence more than they can imagine.

I am and have been truly blessed by these Godly men on the mission team.

My boys.

I got to spend time with two of the boys that I have babysat since they were born.

I took them out to dinner this evening and then we watched some AFV and cuddled on the couch after we took a ton of pictures.

I love those boys like crazy and hate to have to say goodbye.

It's hard to say goodbye and watch them get mad because you're leaving again.

It makes it really hard.

I cannot wait until October when I get to come back and see them again.

Ok, so now for the lengthy section of not so good stuff.

I grew up in the Nazarene church (I got to a baptist church now).

I grew up in the church my grandpa pastored.

When I was a kid I loved going to my church and I loved all the people there.

This lasted until probably around 5th grade.

At this point I realized how much the church and those in leadership positions were concerned about the politics of the church. Most of the time the politics of the church were viewed as more important than the church itself.

Now maybe it's just me, but I don't think that that is how God wants the church to be.

I learned a lot of lessons from the church and the people in it over the next 7 years.

Although I have to say that the majority of them were not positive like you might expect.

I learned a lot of lessons I figured I would learn from the world rather than the church.

Some of the things that I learned are:

-People are not necessarily to be trusted (with personal matters or otherwise)

-People  will tear you down and rip you apart to get what they want

-If you don't suck up to people then you mean nothing to them

-People don't really care what you have to say or what you think

-Emotions are also highly overrated

-If you are a child of a pastor (senior, youth, etc.) you're automatically held to a much higher standard than everyone else and the slightest slip means you get looked down upon by everyone

-And many other lessons could be listed.

As you can see I didn't really learn anything positive from the church here.

It's hard to come home and go to the church here.

I feel like I should be excited to come back here and see everyone at church, but in all honesty I have a hard time even making myself go to church here.

I haven't had a connection with anyone here in years.

I hardly even went my last two years of high school.

It wasn't that I didn't want to go to church, because I really did.

Rather I didn't want to go because every time I was there I felt like I was being stared at and judged by everyone there. It didn't feel welcoming at all.

And ever since I left for school last August, the only people from the church who have contacted me at all are the parents of the kids I babysat.

No one else contacted me at all, but they were constantly talking to and conversing with the other college students from the church.

I can tell you why that is but I will refrain because it would end up being a rather lengthy description.

It was just hard being at church this Sunday because I felt very much like people would have even noticed I was there had it not been for the 3 adults that actually did care and make an effort to keep up on how I am doing while i'm in Illinois.

I really just wanted to leave within minutes of being there.

Had it not been for one of my boys coming and sitting with me during service it would have been a very long morning.

It also helped when I got a text from McKenzie.

After asking about the trip back here, he told me that everyone at Journey was asking where I was.

People have no idea how much that means to me.

The fact that they noticed that I wasn't there since i've only been going for about 5 months is something I wouldn't have expected.

The church here that I went to for 13 years didn't even ask that the first Sunday I was away at college. Not a single one of them.

Journey has been a blessing and I hope to stay apart of the church and their ministry for the next few years at least.

Now to get to family stuff.

If only I could share everything that is on my mind relating to this topic.

I can't do so because some of it shouldn't be shared and there is just far too much on my mind regarding the subject.

The main thing right now has to deal with my mom.

I like to come back here to visit for a few days, but it is very hard to come back.

When i'm at school my mom encourages all of the things I do and has not an issue with any of it.

Soon as i'm back here she treats me like i'm in middle school still.

I'm going to be 20yrs old in 6 months.

I am an adult but she treats me like a kid all the time when i'm home.

It makes it really hard to come back here to visit.

It's making me really consider just staying in Illinois for the summers and for a while after graduating.

I don't know that I will come back to Nebraska to live.

I love Nebraska but I just can't do it anymore.

Well, that is as far as I am going to go into those topics on here for the evening.

I really just wish there was someone I could talk to.

I feel the need to just have an actual conversation and discuss things face to face with someone.

Oh well, I do not have that opportunity at the moment.

It's going to be a long night of packing, listening/singing to music, and praying.

God has gotten me this far and I have no doubt that He will get me through whatever is coming.

It is through Him that I can do all things!!

Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Syndrome (RSDS)/ Chrnic Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS)

As of late I have been asked quite frequently about my mom's disorder.

After explaining it multiple times, I figured that it might be beneficial to just make a quick post about it.

So I am going to try to make this a fairly short post, but I will also be trying to cover the main points that should be known about RSDS/CRPS.

My mom was diagnosed 5 years ago (this September) with Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Syndrome (RSDS) or Chronic/Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS).

This is a disease of the Sympathetic Nervous System (SNS).

It basically means that the SNS is not working properly. Nerves are misfiring, so they are constantly sending pain signals to the brain.

This disease can be caused by a traumatic injury or just a bump on a table.

The disease does not appear to be linked to the severity/magnitude of the injury.

There is no exact cause that has been noted.

There are many symptoms that accompany the disease, some of which are:

-Severe burning pain

(My mom refers to it as burning pain and pins & needles pain, but like 10 times worse than what we would experience normally. But it is constant and never ending.)

-Extreme sensitivity to touch, light, water, hot/cold, etc.

-Tissue swelling

-Frequent changes in skin color and temperature

-Contracture (limited limb movement due to tightening of the muscles and tendons)

-Muscular Atrophy

There are many other symptoms of the disease but it can get to be a long list that few people actually want to read.

There are two types of CRPS.

Type 1 is due to injuries that have no direct link to any nerve damage.

Type 2 is due to injuries that caused direct nerve damage.

There are treatments available, although most of them are focused on pain management since there is not cure for the disease at the present moment.

Pain medication and antidepressants are some of the most common treatments.

Nerve Blocks, Intrathecal Drug Pumps, Spinal Cord Stimulation, and physical/occupational therapy are other treatment options used frequently.

Surgical Sympathectomy can be used, but it is not guaranteed and it could cause the disease to worsen in the limb and/or spread to other areas of the body.

This disease is 2-3 times more likely for females than males and it affects 200,00 to 1.2million Americans.

My mom got this disease as the result of a cat bite she got at work.

Yes, you read that right. 

A cat bite.

At the time she was working at an Assisted Living Facility back home and they have two cats that they keep for the residents.

My mom was working nights and one night she was cleaning the lobby.

One of the cats came up behind her and laid down.

Not realizing that the cat was behind her, she stood up and stepped backwards.

She stepped on the cat who in turn bit the back of her left ankle.

This was completely in defense and my mom thought nothing of it, especially since she grew up around cats and had been bitten many of times before.

However, by the time she got of work at 6am she could not walk on her left foot at all.

She went to the ER and they just gave her pain medication and crutches.

The ER doctors did not know what was going on.

Within about a week or two her left foot started to turn inwards.

Seeing as this is not normal, she went into the doctor and they gave her this boot thing to wear to try and keep the foot straight.

This was worn for a while, but it eventually got to the point that she couldn't stand to wear it any longer.

My mom was in severe pain and the sensitivity to just about everything was crazy. 

She went to several doctors and it took a while before any of them made the connection to RSDS.

In September 2007 my mom was put in a wheelchair.

She has been in the wheelchair ever since and she will never walk again unless a major miracle happens.

The first couple years were kind of crazy due to the fact that we did not know much about the disease and she did not know how to handle the nonstop pain that accompanies the disease.

It was a very stressful couple of years with everything that was going on.

At 14 I was thrown into the position of being an adult and it was a hard adjustment.

Not to mention an extremely fast one.

I watched my mom go through a lot and got used to knowing which medication she needed when and what days she went to which doctors or therapy sessions.

It became pretty much the central focus of life.

I watched as my mom came extremely close to dying several times as a result of different treatments that were being tried.

I remember the 2am ER trips via ambulance because the disease was acting up.

I remember the port being put in so she could get medicine more easily injected when she went to the hospital. The numerous days that she was in pain because of it.

I remember the port being taken out and the week or so of pain that came from that.

I remember so many of these things.

I wish I could go on and in more detail, but I do mot want to bore anyone.

I am more than willing to share more if you contact me.

I will probably share more in the future without a doubt since it is a major part of my life.

But I am going to leave it at this for tonight.

Like I said, if you want to feel free to contact with me questions.

I will willingly answer them if I know or do my best to get an answer for you.

God has brought my mom, my sisters, and I through this for almost 5yrs now.

I have no doubt that He will continue to lead us and provide for us in the coming years.

We only go this far because of Him.

God is good!!