So these last two days I was at a Pastor's Conference put on by IBSA. I was there to work for the most part. I helped with greeting people and just taking care of whatever things needed to be taken care of. I also got to be babysitter for quite a bit of it for my worship pastor's baby boy. When I got on the bus to head to Springfield on Tuesday morning I was tired but excited to be there and to see people from across the state. Despite being tired, Tuesday was a good day. Then we got to the last speaker of the day (his name escapes me). He was telling a bit about his story and brought into the message that he and his wife have a guitar shop. He brought in two guitars to use as visuals for his message. They were both Fenders, but there was a big difference between them. One was a classic Fender from the 50s and the other was a reissued Fender from mid-2000s. What's the difference you may be asking? Let me explain.
The classic Fender is still the same as it was when it was made. It didn't look the prettiest. There was a cigarette burn on it, scratches, and so on. But it still sounded nice and played nice. This Fender is worth a ton of money and people will do a lot to get their hands on one. The reissued Fender on the other hand looks beautiful. It had a gorgeous stain, no scratches, and no burns. It played really good and it sounded really good. Yet this beautiful guitar only sells for around half the price of the classic. People aren't as interested in the reissued Fender.
Why is one more valuable than the other? Well you see, the reissued Fender was made by some person we couldn't name, while the classic guitar was made by someone incredible. It was made by the master himself, Mr. Fender.
The speaker proceeded to connect this to us. The classic guitar is the child of God. He created us and designed us. We were designed by the Master Himself. Over the course of our journey, our life, we get scratched up, bandaged up, and burned. Yet when we are truly in a relationship with Him and trusting Him we are like that guitar. We play good and we sound good. We still live life according to His guidance and we still speak of Hi grace, forgiveness, and peace. We don't look pretty due to damage from the world, but we still play and sound good. We are wanted and our worth is incredibly high.
The reissued Fender would be those who aren't in relationship with God. They've been stained by the world and that stain can look absolutely gorgeous when you look at it. They also have been through the same junk that the children of God but they are redoing themselves so that they look shiny and new. They've learned what to say and do so that no one suspects anything. They are inticing. They play really good and they sound really good. But despite looking good on the outside and playing and sounding nice, the reissued Fenders aren't worth near as much as the classics. People don't want them. They really don't have much value.
I know which one that most everyone would say I am, but it's not the one that I feel like I am a lot of times. Far too often I see myself as the reissued Fender. I look like I've got everything together, I do what I'm supposed to do (really want to do) , and I say the right things. A lot of times the things I do and say aren't worldly, but I feel like I use those things to cover up the scratches, bruises, and burns that I have. I feel that my worth is half of what everyone else's is and that no one wants me. These things stem from my past and I hate having them come up over and over, so I try to hide them. I cover them up my making it seem like I've got it all together. I say the right things and I do the right things. I put a smile on and do my best to cheer everyone else up even when I'm at rock bottom. These words and actions are the stain that I use to cover up the bruises, scratches, and burns. To make myself look pretty to everyone else. And it works all the time. Very few people would even take a guess at the number of days that I've used that stain to make it look like I was pretty, like everything was wonderful.
This message hit me hard because I've been having a rough week or so dealing with a lot of feelings of not being worthy of so many things. I was wondering why I have what I have because I am far from worthy. Everything that I've done and been through makes it really easy to believe that I am not worthy. That my worth is extremely low and no one wants me.its been on my mind and really pushing me down for several days now and that message was icing on the cake. That description of the reissued Fender hit home. I realized that I am that reissued Fender, or at least I feel like it a lot.
While I was feeling pretty down in the dumps last night and today, I was also trying to do my best to make sure a close friend/'brother' of mine was doing okay and that he knew I had his back. It hasn't been an easy couple weeks but I'm working on getting past it. Getting lots of baby time yesterday and today always serves for a wonderful distraction and I welcomed it with open arms. But now I have a lot of time to focus on this analogy that was presented. I want to figure out how I get beyond feeling like the reissued Fender....because I'm not a fan of it.
